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"Fishez" OK, ok, ok....you asked for it and now it is Time for another Wacked out NOVEL by me.... See Trailer at; www.MySpace.com/FishezTheMovie Original Music by Neil Zaza This time........It's all the SeaLife in the Oceans that are Pissed off.... ...at the Human Race for eating them, abusing them, running them over with their spinning Propellers, piercing their tender bodies with razor sharp fishing hooks, holding them captive in small Aquariums & Making them perform "dumb" fish jumping tricks at seaworld!! Now...A four inch goldfish named "Guppy" has organized all of the Sharks, Groupers, Barracudas, Dolphins, Giant Squids, Whales, etc..... ...To Take out.... ....All 80 foot or less Ocean Boats!! And, then.... they recruit the Giant Whales & Squids to..... ....Take out all Freighters...OVER 80 FEET!!... ...Bringing all Ocean Shipping to a Standstill!! ... And....a final Armagedden Showdown between all the World's Military and.......All SeaLife! This is really WILD...I Just FINISHED writing it...for you to READ it!! Original Signed Manuscript is Available...for a price, email me. Michael D. Stevens Author VS |
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| Michael D. Stevens Author |
Fishez©
A “True” Science Fiction Novel
By
Michael D. Stevens
A “True” Science Fiction Novel
By
Michael D. Stevens
9/20/2006
Fishez
From the Land of Conflict….
We return to the SEA of Calm.
As there is no Greater Security in the world…
than the Wall-Less Countries of the Ocean!
Michael D. Stevens
Author
Fishez….
…Years of abuse from pleasure and commercial crafts of the Seas, have left their indelible marks
upon all sea creatures in the great oceans of the world.
If mankind did not run Fishez over and over with their sharp propellers, then they slaughtered
them for useless gains…..And then….Contaminated their precious sea homes with oil, debris and
toxic wastes.
The Fishez that were captured, were forced to do back flips at Seas World for morsels of food.
They were hungry most of the time and further humiliated by being poked at by little kids, with no
respect for any type of life.
Scientific Experiments on little gold fish guppies resulted in their untimely demise, but for one.
One little tiny 4 inch fish named Guppy…who survived months and months of abuse and
torture….only to emerge with a 570 Mensa IQ…and…an Attitude!
Escaping from Battele’s Experimental lab in Columbus, Ohio and the clutches of the US
Government, Guppy made her way to the oceans, where she witnessed untold harm to her fellow
creatures and to the once clean, clear, blue waters that covers 2/3 of the Planet Earth.
Guppy wanted to be a counselor, a philosopher, a crusader of good that would result in a
tranquil, peaceful and harmonious world…but…Fate would have it otherwise….as Guppy had no
other choice, but to declare war on the human race and rewrite history as…….Guppy….
....Guppy the Great!!
What others Say about “Fishez”…
“FISHEZ is a social parody, with a Darwin-esque twist, featuring the survival of the most deserved; an
Armageddon of environmental justice; a whimsical tale of death, destruction, and everything vulgar and
grotesque--all cleverly interspersed with biting political satire. Michael Stevens is at his BEST!” Tom
Austin 61, Bratenahl, Ohio
“FISHEZ is a real page turner and will make you laugh out loud! Michael Stevens has a way with words
like no other….I really enjoyed all of the characters with their crazy names. I am “Hooked” on FISHEZ!”,
“Looking forward to the movie “Fishez” & Michael Stevens’s next novel!”
Marrieta Roby, 51, Bratenahl, Ohio
“I’m 90 years old and have read many books in my life but never one like this! FISHEZ is loaded with
creativity, action and emotion. I couldn’t stop reading it! Michael D. Stevens is a GENIUS!” Joe Kaim, 90,
Cleveland, Ohio
“This book is for every age group! I quote from Genesis”; “Let the great whales & every living creature
that moveth, which the waters brought forth abundantly and God saw that it was good.” “Guppy, after
failed diplomacy, united all of the sealife to put a stop on man’s evil destruction of the planet earth and
themselves.” “Michael’s ending for FISHEZ is simply MAGNIFICENT!” Gladys B. Stevens, 75, Ashland,
Ohio.
“In the novel Fishez, Guppy has a huge message, a message for the human race; that it is too selfish,
greedy and has no regard for wildlife”, “We should all pay attention to Guppy before it really is too late
for the Human Race!”, “PS: Guppy has great taste in music!”.. Marisa Sobeski, 29, Bratenahl, Ohio
What others Say about “Fishez” (cont’d)
“I couldn’t put the book down!”, “Not only was it fantastically comical, but very EDUCATIONAL”, Great job
at inserting the very original wise sayings by Michael D. Stevens, historic proverbs & quotes”, “FISHEZ
gets an A+ Rating by me & MUST READ for everyone!”..Terry Guess, 42, PHD, Albany, MO.
“A True-Fiction Novel capable of grabbing your mind & throwing it into reality”, “This should be a Best
Seller!” ..Michael Byrne, 20, Bratenahl, Ohio.
“This book is about worldly interest with lots of high impact energy”, “I could not put it down, even
though I don’t read books”, “Michael D. Stevens is a piece of work and the only type of book that I would
read”, “Really looking forward to reading his next novel, whatever it is coming from his brain! ..Roberta
Kaim, 50, Cleveland, Ohio.
“FISHEZ gives you insight on educational respect for all living things”, “If Sharks & Dolphins can co-
exist, then why can’t we?”, “Michael D. Stevens is one great…Very Great Author!”..Shawn E. Kelso, 37,
Cleveland, Ohio
"Imaginative, Creative. Fishez is an insight into the world of animal cruelty and their fight back. A great
read for any child or adult, of which will be captured by Guppy's quest for revenge." ..Mark Maruszak, 16,
Wickliffe Ohio
“FISHEZ should be read by all age groups”, “It is the finest Novel that I have ever read in my life!”,
“Michael D. Stevens is a True Genius!” ..Mark Wernet, 56, Cleveland, Ohio
Dedications
Human Race
The absolute lowest form of intelligent life that throughout history was focused on either conquering or
destroying everything on the Planet Earth.
God
Who gave me the necessary life forces to generate Free Will, within my mindless brain.
Gladys
A mother that gave me the sensitivity toward all forms of life and the emotional ability to proudly cry for
all their needlessly induced sufferings.
Rusky
Who forced me under great Siberian Russian duress, to write a PG rated Novel!
Sherry
A kind heart of gold, generously given to everyone in need, including me.
Marisa
A lady with loving creative inspiration to me with no limits.
Guppy
My 4-inch smart aleck Goldfish.
Dedications (Cont’d)
Mark Wernet
Who believed in me when no one else would.
Bratenahl, Ohio Residents
True-life characters, living lies and leading Un-true lives.
The United States Government
Dedicated to governing the World….Whether it wants governed or not!
GreenPeace.Org
Someone has to care about something being done!
Dean Pomerleau and his Son
'Mad scientists' prove pet fish have more on the ball than we thought”
Teach a fish to play football and ... well, now you really could be on to something. Dean Pomerleau and
his son have trained a pet goldfish to "carry" a football, "shoot" a soccer ball into a net, even "dance"
the limbo. If you don't believe it, you can check out photos and videos at their Web site www.fish-school.
com.
Characters
1) Guppy 4 inch Goldfish
2) Dolphy Baby Female Dolphin
3) Dolpheen Mother Dolphin
4) Dolpher Father Dolphin
5) Doller Doctor Dolphin
6) Flicker Baby Great White Shark
7) BrightWhite Mother Great White Shark
8) MightyWhitey Father Great White Shark
9) SharkKool Black Tiger Shark
10) Dr. Mary Wong Battele Scientist
11) Dr. Dewey Duemore Battele Head
12) President President
13) Skinstein Vice President
14) Rumdum Secretary of Defense
15) Condum National Security Adviser
16) Barbie Presidents Wife
17) Monica Presidential Staff Secretary
18) Suzee Chong Presidents Secretary of Everything
19) General Knieval Navy Admiral 7th Fleet
20) Ying Chinese President
21) Yang Korean President
22) Captain Tubby Tugboat Captain
23) Sucker Scarab Captain
24) DeeDee Suckers Ex wife
25) Trebor President of Halbutt Corporation
Chapters:
1 Bass
2 Captain Tubby
3 Dolphy
4 FishHeads
5 Tap, Tap, Tap
6 Guppy
7 President
8 Sable Island
9 Executive Conversation
10 Kidnapped
11 Trebor Dances
12 First Blood Fishez
13 Tubby’s Headache
14 White House
15 Press Conference
16 Attacked
17 Butchered
18 The Meeting
19 Guppy Returns
20 Fishez Unite
21 It’s Showtime
22 Surrender
Excerpt from Chapters 1, 18, 19 & 20! Buy the Novel if you want to know the rest...it is Worth It...in
the Name of Saving Mankind!
Chapter One
Bass
“Oh no,” shouted Dr. Mary Wong, “another goldfish croaked on me!”
“Don’t worry about it,” sighed a weary Dr. Dewey Duemore, “there’s plenty of fish in the sea,” as he lit up
a black clove cigarette, took a big inhale, then slowly exhaled the black toxic fumes in and around the
fish tank.
“But,” she said, “I’ve been working with these 2 graduate guppies that I got from Dean’s fish college, for
the last 9 months straight.” She hesitated and sighed as she looked at the dead male goldfish.
“Poor little goldfish,” she whispered, “I finally got them both to understand Morse code by tapping it out
on the glass aquarium wall.”
Dr. Duemore put his arm around Dr. Mary Wong, to falsely comfort her on the goldfish’s untimely death
and gently touched her soft, pearl white left shoulder.
“Stop your hand right there,” whispered Dr. Wong. “You’re out of line!”
“Just trying to help,” laughed Dr. Duemore, “to get your mind off that stupid goldfish’s death!”
“Help take your mind off of whom?” questioned Dr. Wong, “you or me or the goldfish?” as Dr. Wong
shook off Dr. Dumore’s hand… which was now gently rubbing and squeezing her arm.
Dr. Duemore started to pout because his male macho mind was wandering and dreaming about Dr.
Wong. He’s been waiting to make love to Dr. Wong, a strikingly beautiful Korean Lady Doctor, for the last
10 months ever since he took over Battelle's Aquatic Strategic Sea-life department or “BASS” for short.
The previous Director, a Mr. Major Tac, ended up going totally insane thereby opening up this $400,000
per year position at the Top Secret government program at Battele’s Research Institute in Columbus,
Ohio.
“Look, Dr. Wong,” said Dr. Duemore, “don’t forget your mission as dictated directly by the President of
the United States.” He took a deep breath and shouted out, “the President himself wants us to utilize
Aquatic Life to spy and gather intelligence on all sea bound shipping traffic.”
“Yah, yah, yah,” said a grinning Dr. Wong, “the DEA wants drug smelling fish, the ATF wants gun smelling
fish, the IRS wants money smelling fish, and the Navy wants fish with nuclear torpedoes strapped to their
tail fins and painted red, white and blue!”
“And, don’t forget the President’s Grand Kids!” added Dr. Duemore, “demanding the fish to perform
aquatic back flip jumps in their private Texas saltwater swimming pool, just like they were trying to do at
Dean’s Goldfish College on the Internet!”
“The heck with the Presidents grand Texas rodent kids!” shouted Dr. Wong.
“Now, now,” answered Dr. Duemore, “we must pacify all of our superior’s requests.”
“You do all the Prez’s requests, Dr. Dewey Duemore, the next time the Prez visits this giant fish tank,”
shouted Dr. Wong.
“It’s not a fish tank!” snapped Dr. Duemore, “it’s a Think Tank!”
“Fish tank, fish tank, friggin fish tank!” snapped back Dr. Wong, “you’re not the one cleaning all of the
fish poop dumped on you by the Government cheese balls,” and then sneeringly said, “or are you?”
“Huck no!” replied Dr. Duemore, but knew otherwise.
Meanwhile, the remaining little 4 inch female goldfish seemed to be mourning her lost male mate by
swimming around in circles. Her eggs still unfertilized lying at the bottom of the tank. She was just
about to get them fertilized by her long time and faithful soul mate named Gupper ….the music was right,
the lights were dim…everything was just perfect for the creation of a new family between the two
guppies. But fate would have it otherwise.
Dr. Wong tapped the Morse code on the wall of the glass fish tank. “Tap, tap, tap…”
“S..O..R..R..Y.”
Surprisingly, the goldfish responded to her by slamming her tail fin against the sensors inside the tank.
Dr. Wong was startled and jumped back. She tripped across her own two feet as she tried to reach for
her notebook. Her hand was shaking as she wrote down the goldfish’s tail taps.
“Dot, dot, dash, dash, dot, dash, dash, dot,” continued for the next forty minutes.
Suddenly the goldfish stopped and went to the opposite corner of the tank.
Dr. Wong breathed a sigh of frustration. She’s been scratching down Morse code for almost an hour and
didn’t even have time to read what she wrote down…..as if there was anything to figure out. Dr.
Duemore was watching her during the entire time.
Dr. Wong’s tight light pink plaid skirt was high in the air, exposing her thigh. Duemore’s mind was
furiously playing within himself about her and not the research.
Suddenly Dr. Wong turned around and startled Dr. Duemore.
Dr. Duemore shook his head full of fantasies and tried to move the awkward situation by saying, “what
did the little goldfish say?”
“She said,” replied Dr. Wong, “she said…….”
“What?” exclaimed Dr. Duemore, “what did she say?”
“That you are a highly overpaid government official being paid for the brains that you don’t possess!”
laughed Dr. Wong, “ha, ha, ha.”
“Go shake a date yourself,” snapped Dr. Duemore, “Dr. Wong!”
“I don’t have to,” snapped back Dr. Wong, “I always have good dates.”
But alas, Dr. Wong was lying. In fact she hasn’t had a date in over a year. Ever since her encounter with
that Indian named Bucky from Mansfield, Ohio. Now locked up in State of Ohio mental institution
because of something to do with dead animals coming back for their Skinz and skinning the people
wearing their Skinz!
“O well,” Dr. Wong’s thinking shifted back to the goldfish saying under her breath, “I have to figure out
why all the tapping from that cute little goldfish,” as she started to feed the information into her Morse
code translation software on her laptop.
“Friggit,” sighed a weary Dr. Wong, as she hit the enter key.
Out of its screen jumped, “Et Cum Spiritu Tuo, Et Cum Spiritu Tuo, Et Cum Spiritu Tuo.”
“Forty five minutes of deciphering taps and all I get is this garbage,” shouted Dr. Wong, “pure garbage in
and now pure garbage out!”
”Holy mackerel,” whispered a weary Dr. Wong, “I have to get something out of this goldfish tapping
sounds.” She took a deep breath and sighed out, “I’ve got to get some kind of progress for this love sick
Director besides him wanting to simply overpower me,” as she hit the print key and stuffed the computer
printout into her tight fitting satin white coat pocket.
“Maybe something will make sense from this code smoke of some type of hieroglyphics,” she mumbled
as she took a long puff of her menthol cigarette.
She blew out the smoke with the words, “I just wish I could get something beneficial out of the funky fish
tanks besides fish fart poop from the funky smelling fish flakes!”
Dr. Wong exited the lab. She passed through the Security doors, into her pink Corvette and floored it
past the Security Guards at the gatehouse. She pelted them with rocks from the gravel exit road and
broke the gatehouse glass windows.
“Loser boozer!” shouted one of the two guards.
“Yeah, yeah,” added the second guard, “everyday, the same old stuff everyday, she’s spinning her tires
and throwing gravel on us.”
“Shut up,” shouted back the first guard, “you are a Marine so just take it and shut the buck up!”
“But I would like to get to know her,” he added, “know her well!”
“Yah,” sighed the first guard as he watched the Corvettes tail lights disappear into the setting sun over
Columbus Ohio, “me too.”
Dr. Wong turned on the radio, accidentally hitting on a religious station.
“Et Cum Spiritu Tuo,” chanted the radio. Dr. Wong started to chant along with it.
“Et Cum Spiritu Tuo,”…suddenly, her eyes grew wide. She then slammed the car to a screeching halt!
She pulled out the computer print out and read it in a very loud, but serious voice,
“Et Cum Spiritu Tuo, Et Cum Spiritu Tuo …. H2O?”
“H2O?” thought Dr. Wong.
Chapter 18
The Meeting
Movie Trailer Avaiable at;
www.MySpace.com/FishezTheMovie
Guppy was sunning herself under the nice warm rays of the afternoon sun. Catching a little nap, she
knew that she had to do her best to try and convince the world leaders to stop this all out unwarranted
brutal attack upon the Fishez of the ocean.
Little did she realize that she was heading into a trap. A trap designed to kill her and all of her new
found friends!
“Guppy,” said MightyWhitey, “I got some of my buddies to escort you to your meeting.”
“Thank you,” said Guppy, “you are most kind,” and she fell off into a much needed, deep sleep.
As Guppy slept, the Fishez of the oceans had heard about her and rallied in masses to the North side of
Sable Island from around the world.
Not just a few Fishez, but millions gathered within their new leaders waters. They patiently waited,
wished and hoped that Guppy could convince the world leaders of a peaceful solution.
A peaceful solution could stop the abuse and death of tens of millions of sea life creatures. A solution
allowing that they all could live in harmony on this planet.
“It is time,” whispered MightyWhitey, “it is time for your meeting,” and he woke up Guppy.
Guppy awoke, feeling rested but disturbed because she sensed a trap. She knew that she had to at
least take the risk of trying her best to change the Humans destructive thinking, even if she had to
sacrifice her own life! Much like another messenger from God did over 2000 years ago!
“I’m going too!” shouted Flicker.
“No!” said Guppy, “You need to be here, ah, protecting the Fishez.”
“And protecting me,” added Dolphy, who was falling deeper and deeper in love with that little mangled
tail shark.
“Then, onward we go!” shouted MightyWhitey as he signaled to the 200 Great White Shark Fishez
bodyguards.
MightyWhitey led the group towards the Glouster Bay Harbor. Guppy was hanging onto his tail with her
little teeth and front fins. The Shark Guards surrounded them.
As they entered the harbor, past the rocky entrance, the sun was just beginning to set on the horizon.
Sparkling, diamond studded waves made it the perfect atmosphere to conduct a peaceful meeting.
Upon reaching FishHeads, Guppy saw the President, his staff, the world leaders. Trebor was dressed in
a bright pink, pin stripe armor suit, holding a MP3 player in his hand for Guppy.
Guppy stood up upon MightWhitey’s back, took the MP3 player from Trebor and said, “Thank you, you are
a very kind person.”
“Shut up,” shouted the President, “you here to talk, or give up?”
Guppy turned to the numerous leaders, sitting on the decks of FishHeads and said, “I come in Peace and
want to leave in Peace.”
The leaders were amazed that Guppy could talk not only in English, but also in French, Spanish, Italian,
Chinese and numerous other languages.
“I am,” said Guppy, “simply a Messenger, delivering a Problem-less Peaceful Message, that we should
all, live in world peace with each other before problems arise that are out of all of our control.”
“What problem can we possibly learn from you,” asked the French leader.
"The first problem for the Human Race is not to learn, but to Unlearn," replied Guppy.
“You want to fight?” asked the German leader.
"I don't know how to fight,” replied Guppy, “All I know is how to stay alive."
“What do you know about what’s right for the world?” snapped the Turkish leader.
“Guppy said, "To put the world in order, we must first put the nation in order, to put the nation in order,
we must first put the family in order, to put the family in order we must first cultivate our personal life
and to cultivate our personal life, we must set our hearts right"
“Sounds like Confucius,” said Yang, the Japanese Leader
“It is, as you know,” said Guppy as she continued quoting Confucius, "The heart of the wise, like a mirror,
should reflect all objects without being sullied by any."
“You are free to speak,” said Ying, the Chinese Leader.
Guppy continued, “We should never let our fears hold us back, from pursuing hopes.”
“What idiot said that?” shouted the President.
“John F. Kennedy PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES 1917-1963,” replied Guppy.
“Just give up all your power and intelligence, and …” said the President, “and we will let you live in
peace.”
"You easily give up your Power," Guppy replied, "By thinking that you don't have any.”
“The truth is what I am telling you,” quipped the President
"Truth has rough flavors, when you chew it,” said Guppy, "You have only one soul, one Life that is
shortly lived alone caring about so many things which you should care nothing about on this earth,”
Guppy sighed and continued, “Because they are simply short interferences in pursuing the only One
Eternal Glory in Your Heaven.”
“What are you seeking?” quizzed the Spanish Leader.
Guppy replied, "We seek to make all earth life forms free to speak, express, worship and most of all free
from fear.”
“You say you lost your freedom to fear?” quizzed the Mexican Leader.
"When love, justice and force are lost by fear, then it's time to start over agai,” replied Guppy.
“We have done so much for the environment,” stated the Director of Greenpeace.
"One should never notice what has been done," replied Guppy, "But only see what remains to be done.”
“It takes courage,” snapped the President, “to be a President like me, a famous Navy Aviator Pilot, not a
stupid peace lover dover fish like you!”
"Courage is the price life extracts for granting peace," quoted Guppy,
“Who said that?” screamed the President, “that stupid cupid saying?”
“Amelia Earhart, a famous American true aviator,” said Guppy, "He who loses courage, has nothing worth
keeping."
“Courage is fearless!” snapped the President.
“Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear, not absence of fear," said Guppy quoting Mark Twain
AMERICAN WRITER 1835-1910.
The German leader, an ex-Nazi, shouted, “Are you Jew fish?”
Guppy answered, "He who has courage and faith, will never perish in misery,” quoting Anne Frank
GERMAN JEWISH SCHOOLGIRL DIARY 1929-1945.
“Why you living to die, to save the Fishez?” asked the Italian Leader.
"If I can save one living thing, then I shall not have lived in vain," replied Guppy.
“I want everything,” shouted the Iranian President.
"Teach your heart to want nothing it can't have," replied Guppy.
Ying added, "He who wishes to secure the good of others has already secured his own."
“Right on, Confucius,” replied Guppy, “Life begins and ends in a mystery, only you can build the bridge
between them and now is your Tomorrow.”
There was an obvious silence as the little goldfish’s statements mesmerized the world.
"Action will not bring happiness but there is no happiness without action," as Guppy cleared her throat,
she stated in a low stern voice, "The only thing in life that matters is your courage to get through it.”
“It’s all the United States fault,” screamed out the New Iraq President.
"Never Complain," added Guppy, "Never Explain.”
“Continue,” said Ying, “O, wise Guppy on what we should keep away from and what we should build.”
"Keep away from Wisdom that does not cry, keep away from Philosophy that does not laugh and keep
away from greatness that does not bow down from God," Guppy continued, "War destroys in order to
build deaths, not life.”
“Smart aleck fish,” snapped Skinstein.
“Let her speak,” said the Russian leader, “speak all that is on your mind, O wise Guppy on what we
should challenge.”
"Challenge everything in front of you and nothing behind you,” Guppy sighed out, "Because you and I
exist not in the minds of others, but in the minds of ourselves because hope rests on the wings of
lesser things than Kings.”
“Cement your fish lips shut!” snapped the President.
"Total love for life is the cement of the world," snapped back Guppy, “Non-Violence is the law of all
species; violence is the law of the extinct because wars for peace have no victories.”
“This fish witch bitch is getting on my nerves,” whispered the President to Skinstein.
Guppy continued, knowing that she only had a few moments to speak, "The highest level of work is not
what you get out of it, but what you become by it and to prove the possible, you must do the impossible.”
“You are evil,” shouted Skinstein, who was obviously upset by Guppy’s statements. He threw his veiled
Jewish Cap at Guppy just missing her by an inch.
"Lift the veil of evil and you will still find evil," shouted back Guppy, "Forget what you get, care what you
give.”
Rumdum whispered to the President, “We must kill this little ditch witch fish, right now because she’s
going to mess up our Master Democratic World Plan, the United States of Earth (USE).”
“Yes,” snapped back the President, “she’s too smart for us, way too, too smart.”
With that Rumdum whispered into the cell phone, connected to the Generals in Charge of the ambush
and said, “Now, attack now!”
"Accept Injustice, only from your grave," said Guppy, knowing what Rumdum said into his cell phone and
what was going to now happen. She then shouted out with all of her little might "Give me not sheltered
safety in chains, but liberty without them!"
Trebor also overheard Rumdum and yelled out, “Stop fighting, Guppy!”
“Stay out of this fight,” snapped Rumdum, “you flaming fart!”
"If you can't get out of a fight, get into it," screamed out Trebor, as he jumped into the shark filled ocean.
Trebors head emerged out of the water along with his white fake fur wrapped scarf. He gave the
President of the United States his fist and shrilled at the top of his lungs. "Give me liberty or give me
death," quoting Patrick Henry.
“No one gives the President the fist and gets away with it,” shouted Rumdum, as several Secret
Servicemen open up with their machine guns, “Ratta, tat, tat, tata, tatta, tat.”
Just then, 3 Great Whites jumped in front of Trebor, took all 80 rounds of 9mm machine gun bullets. They
died instantly.
“Kill that Guppy!” shouted the President, “he’s an obvious traitor to our country and an enemy of liberty.”
“Ratta, tat tat, tata, tatta tat,” went 80 rounds of bullets heading straight for Guppy.
“I will protect you,” shouted MightyWhitey, taking every bullet meant for Guppy.
“No, no,” Guppy shouted, “he’s a father, with a son.”
MightyWhitey was hit hard! His fish eyes and body were bleeding profusely from the penetration of the
numerous bullets. He sighed, “Go Guppy, swim as fast as you can, away from these murderers.” Blood
started coming out of his mouth as he gurgled out, “Here, take my Shark tooth, aaand … and give it to my
son, Flicker, please tell him that love him and his mother so very, very much,” and with that,
MightyWhitey rolled onto his back and died. His fish eyes remained wide open, reflecting the now
laughing human images on the deck of FishHeads.
“No, no, no,” cried Guppy, “no, no, no!”
Ying kicked the President in the shins, screaming, “No one dishonors Confucius.” The Secret
Servicemen then opened up their machine guns on him, “Ratta, tat tat, tata, tatta tat,” wounding him,
along with Yang who was assisting his oriental buddy in kicking the Presidents shins.
“Now,” shouted Rumdum into the Cell phone, “right now, my mighty United States Troops!”
Immediately, the PT Navy boats drew their fishnets across the harbor, trapping the 200 sharks plus
Guppy within it.
“Booom, boooom, bboooooom,” went the underwater mines with a deafening shock killing explosion
force. Immediately killing over half of the sharks, “Booom, boooom, bboooooom”
As the remaining sharks made it to the surface, Air Force Jets came in with their machine guns blazing,
“Ratta, tat tat, tata, tatta tat … Ratta, tat tat, tata, tatta tat … Ratta, tat, tat, tata, tatta, tat…”
“Looks like shark soup for our daily special tonight,” quipped the Owner of the FishHeads restaurant.
The remaining Sharks protected both Trebor and Guppy, but they were losing their comrades fast, too
fast. As four died, 4 four more came to Guppy’s protection.
Trebor’s pink armor suit became discolored and engulfed with seaweed in the turmoil waters. His new
red and blue boots floated to the surfaced, still mismatched. He had just got the outfit last night as a
present from DeeDee, not knowing that DeeDee wore the same outfit for the President when he first
arrived in Glouster.
Both Guppy and Trebor were now riding upon the 2 fastest Great White Sharks; the others were taking
massive amounts of bullets trying to their best to protect them.
Just then, a barracuda fish came up and told Guppy that they had cut a hole within the fishnets, to give
them an escape route. MightyWhitey had set it up with the Barracudas prior to the meeting. He also
suspected a trap by the humans, but would not live long enough to tell about it, or ever see his only son
again.
“Hold on, Trebor!” yelled Guppy, “Hold your breath.” They held on to the 2 Great White Sharks
submerging down 20 feet and through the hole in the net.
They both surfaced about 500 yards from the nets and were momentarily safe.
As Guppy was looking back into the Glouster Harbor, she was appalled at the sight of hundreds of dead
Great White Sharks. They were floating and bleeding belly up. The poor Fishez were being used as a
carnival game with the Harbors Boaters cutting and re-cutting their bodies up with their sharp propellers.
The guard Sharks, all 200 of them, sacrificed their lives in protecting Guppy!
Guppy looked at MightyWhiteys single tooth and tears started rolling down her face.
Guppy turned to Trebor and said, "Suffering teaches you what you cannot be taught." She then turned
back to the Glouster Harbor’s up and coming new Fishez graveyard.
“Jesus,” screamed out Trebor, “what, in Gods name … would Jesus do?”
“Jesus … said it best,” sighed Guppy, "Do unto others, as you would have them do unto you!”
Chapter 19
Guppy Returns
“It’s them!” yelled Flicker “It’s Guppy on the horizon!”
“I smell blood,” whispered BrightWhite, “lots of blood!”
“Guppy, Guppy!” shouted Flicker “How did it go?” He looked around Guppy and asked, “Where’s the
rest of the sharks?”
“Where’s my husband?” cried out BrightWhite, “Where’s Mighty Whitey?”
Guppy looked and starred at BrightWhite, then she looked at the rest of the Fishez, all of whom were
eagerly awaiting good news, but they were not to have any…today!
“I’m sorry,” cried out Guppy, “BrightWhite … your husband and MightyWhitey gave up their lives to save
me from the humans,” Guppy swam over next to BrightWhite and sobbed, “here is his tooth, he wanted
you to have it before he died.”
“Nooo, no, no,” cried BrightWhite, “not my MightyWhitey,” she sobbed and sobbed.
“Mmmyyy, my daddy,” sobbed Flicker “is not coming home to me?”
“I am afraid to say, yes,” said Guppy, “your father was a very brave shark, the bravest that I have ever
known.”
“No!” sobbed Flicker “Not, not my daddy!” Dolphy swam next to him, trying her best to comfort him in his
need of sorrow along with hers.
“Where are the rest of the guard sharks?” asked Doc Doller.
“Gone,” whispered Guppy, “it was a trap by the humans, and, and they all died except for these last two
brave ones,” Guppy looked at the injured ones and said, “Doc, please tend to their wounds as best that
you can, please.”
Trebor wept at the sight of the crying Fishez. Never has he seen such emotion, nor would he ever
permit this to happen again to any living species. He was a changed man. “No more Misses nice
person,” he thought, “now, a scorned, bad bitch!”
“I failed!” sighed a tearful Guppy, “I failed so very miserably, failed, failed.”
“Failure is not an option,” Trebor shouted out to Guppy “failure is not an option,” as he was joined in by
hundreds, then thousands, then millions of Fishez chanting, “Failure is not an option, failure is not an
option, failure is not an option!”
Guppy’s eyes grew wide because her students had now become the teachers. She was so very proud of
that fact. Guppy whispered to herself, "Pray with your heart, not words and you will hear the right beats.”
She then turned to the tens of millions of Fishez that starred at her every move. Guppy said in a low
deep tone of voice, "Peace does not compromise with evil, live for your Seeds, not among Weeds.”
With that said, Guppy turned to Flicker and then she said with a tear in her eye, “Your father is counting
on you to take his place.” BrightWhite then wrapped MightyWhiteys tooth in a string of seaweed and
wrapped it around Flicker’s neck.
“Wear this to know your roots and to protect from all harm,” said BrightWhite to Flicker, gently giving him
a kiss.
Flicker turned to BrightWhite and cried out, "When you kiss me mommy, I stay kissed.”
Guppy turned to the Fishez and shouted, "The ultimate strength of a nation, depends entirely upon the
support of it's people, sacrifices of your life, requires an uncommon cause, if we think, then we are able
to accomplish everything that is right, accomplish everything that is good and accomplish everything
that is just!”
“Go now and tell every fish in the ocean to assemble themselves,” shouted Guppy to the Fishez “Here is
where we make our stand!”
Guppy turned her head around and looked at the rivers of blood pouring out of the Glouster Harbor
towards them. Guppy had only two words left inside of her for the Human Race. Two words and only two
words was all that she could muster up.
Guppy slowly turned her head back toward the Fishez that were starring at her. And then turned her
head back towards the bloody Glouster harbor, saying in a low deep stern voice…..
…“Let’s Play!”
Chapter 20
Fishez Unite
“Mr. President, Mr. President,” yelled out Rumdum, “Mr. President.”
“What?” snapped the President, “Who’s pissed at us now?”
“Our satellites indicate,” stuttered Rumdum, “that massive objects are moving on the oceans floor.”
“So what,” quipped the President, “is it an Earthquake?”
“No,” answered Rumdum, “it’s more like living creatures, massive amounts of living creatures.”
“What?” shouted the President, “Fishez?”
“Yep, Fishez!” whispered Rumdum, “Lots and lots of Fishez!”
“How many?” asked the President, “How riggin friggin many?”
“Well,” stuttered Rumdum “over a billion of them!”
“What?” snapped the President, “What are they doing, who the heck are they after?”
“Well, taking an educated guess, I’d say,” said Rumdum, “that they are after us Humans!”
“No way!” sighed the President “If it isn’t Humans declaring war on us, it’s the Fishez”, “Where’s
Skinstein?”
“Ah, he just submitted his resignation,” answered Rumdum, “and boarded the last jet to Mexico City, said
something about practicing Mexican Quail Hunting at the JewCrew Vodka Bar atop the Mayan ruins just
south of Cancun.”
“Jiggin riggin, screwey coward,” snapped the President, “get me Dr. Wong on the phone, at Battelle.”
“Ah,” responded Rumdum “she’s still in HDT School.”
“Get her on the phone,” ordered the President.
“Ring, ring, ring,” the HDT secretary answered it, “Hello?” Dogs were barking in the background, “Arff,
arff, arffff, arrrfff, arf.”
“This is the President? I want Dr. Wong on this phone within 5 minutes!”
“Arff, arff, arffff, arrrfff, arf, this is Dr. Dog Wong, Arff, arff, arffff, arrrfff, arf.”
“I need your help,” shouted the President, “we are under attack by all of the worlds Fishez!”
“Well,” Dr. Wong said, “I guess that you are in the words of my new found friends here, Doggy dudu,
woof woof to you!” and she slammed down the phone, abruptly cutting off the conversation.
“Shit,” whispered the President to himself, “I dog screwed myself again!”
“Get all of our armed forces together,” ordered the President, “and all of the world’s Armed Naval forces
including the kayakers up on the Yukon River, we must muster all of our might and kick those Fishez
Asses, once and for all!”
“We attack Sable Island again at dawn,” snapped the President, “at dawn, we will let all the other forces
get ready to attack on my word and I order all governmental employees to eat only fish foods, and tell the
TV stations to stop running Charlie the Tuna ads cause he’s a stinking terrorist in disguise!”
Rumdum dialed his cell phone to the General of the Navy Yards stationed at Annapolis, Maryland, “Ring,
Ring.”
“General Kneviel, here,” answered the Navy General.
“Kneviel, this is Rumdum,” shouted Rumdum, “I want every available Navy boat and submarine in this
sector, deployed to Sable Island at dawn and every friggin fish is to be blown out of the water!” Rumdum
then commanded General Kneviel “Inform all other war ships to find and team up with the Halibutt’s toxic
waste ships to annihilate the evil demons from the underworld!”
“You mean,” replied General Kneviel, “Fishez?”
“Any friggit thing that has a fin on it!” screamed Rumdum, “The President and I will observe your actions
from Marine One Helicopter.”
“Yeeess,” stuttered General Kneviel, “you got it,” and Rumdum hung up the phone, “Click.”
General Kneviel shouted to his First Officers, “Get every Navy man, every Boat that can shoot a rubber
band, every Nuclear Sub in this sector to be on the way to Sable Island,” and continued in a low
monotone voice, “We attack the Fishez at dawn!”
“Fishez?” chorused the Officers.
“Yes … Anything with a fin or swims is to be destroyed,” shouted General Kneviel, “I want sushi for
everyone in Annapolis, by tomorrow night!”
“Ok!” responded the Officers, “It’s going to be like shooting fish in a barrel, a big barrel … ha, ha, hee,
ho…” Then they laughingly left General Kneviel’s office.
Meanwhile, back at Sable Island, Guppy had just woken up from a much-needed nap. To her surprise,
and as far as she could see, there were Fishez, tens of billions and billions of Fishez, scattered out all
over the ocean.
They were chanting, “Guppy, Guppy, Guppy.”
Each of the species of Fishez had a General in charge of that species and the Generals were all lined up
in front of Guppy. Saluting her with their fins!
Flicker, now led the Sharks of the ocean.
“General Shark Flicker,” he said as he saluted Guppy, “all of our Generals are reporting for duty, Sir.”
Then, each of the Fishez’s Generals, lined up and introduced themselves in alphabetical order of their
Species:
“General Angel Fish, reporting for duty, sir, we will nurse the injured fish since we have no fighting
ability but there are over a million Angels standing by and plenty more Angels, up in heaven to take care
of any lost brethren.”
Guppy replied, “Good, you are both beautiful and caring, take your positions around all of the Fishez
hospitals.”
“General Angler Fish, reporting for duty, sir, we will scare the heck out of anyone, who looks at us.”
Guppy replied, “Good, they humans thing that you are both ugly and scary, take your positions around all
of the beaches of the world.”
“General Barracuda reporting for duty, sir, we will bite, chomp and tear up anything shiny or not, we
number about 120 million worldwide!”
Guppy replied, “Good, you have great teeth, take your positions around all of the boaters, sunbathers
and scuba divers of the world and I just want you to scare them, not kill them unless you hear from me!”
“General Dolphin Dolpheen reporting for duty, sir, we will take care of all of the orphaned Fishez
families, we number about 48 million worldwide!”
“Dolpheen,” Guppy replied, “I admire you, you are very brave and generous courage, Dolpher would
have been proud of you Dolphy, you stay close to your mother.”
“General Moray Eel reporting for duty, sir, we will neutralize all boat communications with our electricity,
we number about 348 million worldwide that can generate over a trillion watts of high voltage!”
Guppy replied, “Good, you have the electricity to shock em back into reality, take your positions around
all of the boats, subs and ships of the world.”
“General Jelly Fish reporting for duty, sir, we will screw up all of the propellers with seaweed and sting
the crap out of any human in the waters, we number about 808 million worldwide including 41 million
Special Forces - Man of Wars!”
Guppy replied, “Good, you have the tentacles to wrap them up, take your positions around all of the
boats and ships of the world along sides with the electric Moray Eels.”
“General Manatee reporting for duty sir, we are just gentle, kind and caring, we number about forty
thousand worldwide, we will assist the Dolphins in nursing the sick and wounded Fishez.” The gentle
Manatee then sighed out, “We are sorry that we are so gentle.”
Guppy whispered, "Compare your accomplishments with your capabilities, not others.” I admire your
very softness and caring but I want every human being solder that was simply following orders to be
saved … General Dolpheen will direct your efforts!”
“Why should we save soldiers?” shouted out Flicker.
“Because,” stated Guppy, “Two wrongs don’t make a right!”
“General Octopus reporting for duty, sir, we will reach and grab the human warriors off of the boats, and
give them to the Barracudas to play with, we number about 198 million worldwide including 11 million
Giant Pacific Ones with 90 foot arms!”
Guppy replied, “Good, you have the long strong tentacles to wrap them up with intelligent brains to
figure out the human maneuvers, take your positions around all of the boats and ships of the world,
along sides with the electric Moray Eels.”
“General Manta Ray, reporting for duty, sir, all of us Rays will salvage the unexploded Bombs, there are
millions of them on the ocean floors from the last 80 years, and ram them into the warships, we number
about 120 million worldwide including 21 million, 22 foot Manta Rays!”
Guppy replied, “Good, you drive and deliver all of the bombs into the ships, take your positions around
all of the boats and ships of the world!”
“General Gay Trebor reporting for duty, sir, I can, well, I can sew, I can look pretty, I can, can”
“Ok, ok,” laughed Guppy, “you can ... hmmm … be the next President of the United States!”
“Well,” smiled Trebor, “I can certainly do a better job than him, first thing is to paint the White House in a
soft shade of pink and, and ...”
“Ok, ok, ok,” said Guppy, “you concentrate on re-decorating the Human Race!”
“General White Shark Flicker reporting for duty, sir, the sharks will leap and attack and grab the human
warriors off of the boats, and eat them like Sushi, we number about 38 million worldwide, with 14 million
of us, over 37 feet, we are streamlined torpedo body swimmers and ferocious predators with 3,000 teeth
at any one time, I do this for my father, MightyWhitey.”
Guppy replied, “Your father would have been very proud of you!”
“General Tiger Shark SharkKool reporting for duty, sir, we will kick their friggin butts, and turn them into
friggin slaves, no friggin humans, gonna screw with the Hood Fishez, we number about 88 million
worldwide with strong ties to the Alligators Bloods and Croc Crypts, I do this for BrightWhite, the only
woman that I have ever really loved.”
“I knew that you’d come back,” cried BrightWhite, “I just knew it but I am pregnant with MightyWhitey’s
child.”
“MightyWhitey took care of my child for me, during my prison stint, and now I will take care of his child for
him, may he rest in peace.”
“Thaaank you,” cried BrightWhite as she gave SharkKool a kiss.
“General Swordfish reporting for duty, sir, we will stab and grab the humans, no matter where they hide
out and make human shish ka bobs out of them for the Barracudas, we number about 53 million
worldwide!”
Guppy replied, “Good, leap high, fly like the wind and find your human marks!”
Just then, a huge, massive elongated body of almost 200 feet long and 10 tons parted the Fishez. Its
eyes were the size of basketballs with a most sinister look upon them. Massive 8 foot suction cups were
at the end of its numerous tentacles.
Guppy whispered “What in the world is this creature, something from another planet?”
“General Giant Squid reporting for duty, sir, we have been attacking ships, off and on since time began,
and now, we are really pissed at all of the toxic bullshit lying at the bottom of the oceans.”
“Darn you’re big,” said Guppy, “how many are you?”
“Classified Sir,” answered General Giant Squid, “but a lot more than Halibutt’s toxic waste barges out
there!”
“Over 8000 of you?” asked Guppy.
“Add a couple of zeros to that,” laughed General Giant Squid, “we’ve been laying low for the last 300
years breeding a Super Size Giant Squid and I am just a baby … ha, ah, ha, ha.”
“Think you could take out a 200 foot Naval Destroyer?” asked Guppy.
“No problem,” laughed General Giant Squid, “piece of cake … Ha, ah, ha, ha.”
“Think you could take out a 1200 foot Air Craft Carrier?” asked Guppy.
“No problem,” laughed General Giant Squid, “it’ll just take a couple of us … ha, ah, ha, ha.”
“Good,” Guppy replied, “go destroy any big boat that has a cannon on it that is trying to harm any Fishez!”
“No problem,” laughed General Giant Squid, “we’ve been waiting a long time for this! Ha, ah, ha, ha.”
“Hmmm?” Guppy thought, “Didn’t know, things like that even existed on this planet.”
General Leatherback Turtle reporting for duty, sir, we are sick and tired of being turned into Turtle Soup
and now, we are very upset about the tables being made out of our shells!”
“Hey,” yelled General SharkKool, “they can roll with the Alleys and Crocs and attack the humans on the
land!”
“Good idea,” replied Guppy, “take your positions up with the Crocs and Alleys.”
“Say,” asked SharkKool, “is dat 50 Cent on your Mp3, get rich or die trying?”
“Shure is,” replied Guppy as they both started to rap to the song.
Just then, another very loud rapper came upon them, with an 188 decibel level, deafening everyone’s
ears, “Boom, backa, BOOM, backa, BOOM!”
“General Blue Whale reporting for duty, Sir, we Blues, we weigh around 175 tons apiece, fast swimmers
and number about 14,000 around the world, plus another 3 million smaller whales.”
“Dang,” replied Guppy, “take your positions up with the Giant Squids.”
“No way,” replied General Blue Whale, “Whales and Giant Squids don’t see eye to eye.”
”Yes way,” ordered Guppy, “United we stand, divided we fall!”
“Big Beachy Blue Whale,” snorted General Giant Squid, “I can kick your fat blue butt anytime I want to!”
“Not today!” snorted back General Blue Whale.
“Stop it,” shouted Guppy, “direct your egos and energy to the human enemy, not each other!”
“Alll righttt, all right,” chorused the Giant Squid and Blue Whale Generals.
“No singing, whaleseee, whaleseee,” laughed General Giant Squid, “ha, hee, a, ha, ha ahaa, ha, ha.”
“Close your ears,” whispered back General Blue Whale, “If ya got any.”
“Ok Generals,” shouted Guppy, “at dawn … is D-Day!”
“Today belongs to the Humans … Tomorrow….”
…..“Belongs to the Fishez!!”
You want more?....
...Buy the Novel!!
Click on...
www.FishezNovel.com
Email; MDS@MDStevens.Net
My Trailer deserves Special Thanks to
(Please email them with your comments):
Without them, I am....less than nothing!
Marisa Sobeski
Bad Bitch Films
Neil Zaza
Greatest Guitarist in the World!
To View Trailer of Chapter 18, go to;
www.MySpace.com/FishezTheMovie
www.YouTube.com/BadBitchFilms
www.OnTheLot.com/BadBtchFilms
A “True” Science Fiction Novel
By
Michael D. Stevens
A “True” Science Fiction Novel
By
Michael D. Stevens
9/20/2006
Fishez
From the Land of Conflict….
We return to the SEA of Calm.
As there is no Greater Security in the world…
than the Wall-Less Countries of the Ocean!
Michael D. Stevens
Author
Fishez….
…Years of abuse from pleasure and commercial crafts of the Seas, have left their indelible marks
upon all sea creatures in the great oceans of the world.
If mankind did not run Fishez over and over with their sharp propellers, then they slaughtered
them for useless gains…..And then….Contaminated their precious sea homes with oil, debris and
toxic wastes.
The Fishez that were captured, were forced to do back flips at Seas World for morsels of food.
They were hungry most of the time and further humiliated by being poked at by little kids, with no
respect for any type of life.
Scientific Experiments on little gold fish guppies resulted in their untimely demise, but for one.
One little tiny 4 inch fish named Guppy…who survived months and months of abuse and
torture….only to emerge with a 570 Mensa IQ…and…an Attitude!
Escaping from Battele’s Experimental lab in Columbus, Ohio and the clutches of the US
Government, Guppy made her way to the oceans, where she witnessed untold harm to her fellow
creatures and to the once clean, clear, blue waters that covers 2/3 of the Planet Earth.
Guppy wanted to be a counselor, a philosopher, a crusader of good that would result in a
tranquil, peaceful and harmonious world…but…Fate would have it otherwise….as Guppy had no
other choice, but to declare war on the human race and rewrite history as…….Guppy….
....Guppy the Great!!
What others Say about “Fishez”…
“FISHEZ is a social parody, with a Darwin-esque twist, featuring the survival of the most deserved; an
Armageddon of environmental justice; a whimsical tale of death, destruction, and everything vulgar and
grotesque--all cleverly interspersed with biting political satire. Michael Stevens is at his BEST!” Tom
Austin 61, Bratenahl, Ohio
“FISHEZ is a real page turner and will make you laugh out loud! Michael Stevens has a way with words
like no other….I really enjoyed all of the characters with their crazy names. I am “Hooked” on FISHEZ!”,
“Looking forward to the movie “Fishez” & Michael Stevens’s next novel!”
Marrieta Roby, 51, Bratenahl, Ohio
“I’m 90 years old and have read many books in my life but never one like this! FISHEZ is loaded with
creativity, action and emotion. I couldn’t stop reading it! Michael D. Stevens is a GENIUS!” Joe Kaim, 90,
Cleveland, Ohio
“This book is for every age group! I quote from Genesis”; “Let the great whales & every living creature
that moveth, which the waters brought forth abundantly and God saw that it was good.” “Guppy, after
failed diplomacy, united all of the sealife to put a stop on man’s evil destruction of the planet earth and
themselves.” “Michael’s ending for FISHEZ is simply MAGNIFICENT!” Gladys B. Stevens, 75, Ashland,
Ohio.
“In the novel Fishez, Guppy has a huge message, a message for the human race; that it is too selfish,
greedy and has no regard for wildlife”, “We should all pay attention to Guppy before it really is too late
for the Human Race!”, “PS: Guppy has great taste in music!”.. Marisa Sobeski, 29, Bratenahl, Ohio
What others Say about “Fishez” (cont’d)
“I couldn’t put the book down!”, “Not only was it fantastically comical, but very EDUCATIONAL”, Great job
at inserting the very original wise sayings by Michael D. Stevens, historic proverbs & quotes”, “FISHEZ
gets an A+ Rating by me & MUST READ for everyone!”..Terry Guess, 42, PHD, Albany, MO.
“A True-Fiction Novel capable of grabbing your mind & throwing it into reality”, “This should be a Best
Seller!” ..Michael Byrne, 20, Bratenahl, Ohio.
“This book is about worldly interest with lots of high impact energy”, “I could not put it down, even
though I don’t read books”, “Michael D. Stevens is a piece of work and the only type of book that I would
read”, “Really looking forward to reading his next novel, whatever it is coming from his brain! ..Roberta
Kaim, 50, Cleveland, Ohio.
“FISHEZ gives you insight on educational respect for all living things”, “If Sharks & Dolphins can co-
exist, then why can’t we?”, “Michael D. Stevens is one great…Very Great Author!”..Shawn E. Kelso, 37,
Cleveland, Ohio
"Imaginative, Creative. Fishez is an insight into the world of animal cruelty and their fight back. A great
read for any child or adult, of which will be captured by Guppy's quest for revenge." ..Mark Maruszak, 16,
Wickliffe Ohio
“FISHEZ should be read by all age groups”, “It is the finest Novel that I have ever read in my life!”,
“Michael D. Stevens is a True Genius!” ..Mark Wernet, 56, Cleveland, Ohio
Dedications
Human Race
The absolute lowest form of intelligent life that throughout history was focused on either conquering or
destroying everything on the Planet Earth.
God
Who gave me the necessary life forces to generate Free Will, within my mindless brain.
Gladys
A mother that gave me the sensitivity toward all forms of life and the emotional ability to proudly cry for
all their needlessly induced sufferings.
Rusky
Who forced me under great Siberian Russian duress, to write a PG rated Novel!
Sherry
A kind heart of gold, generously given to everyone in need, including me.
Marisa
A lady with loving creative inspiration to me with no limits.
Guppy
My 4-inch smart aleck Goldfish.
Dedications (Cont’d)
Mark Wernet
Who believed in me when no one else would.
Bratenahl, Ohio Residents
True-life characters, living lies and leading Un-true lives.
The United States Government
Dedicated to governing the World….Whether it wants governed or not!
GreenPeace.Org
Someone has to care about something being done!
Dean Pomerleau and his Son
'Mad scientists' prove pet fish have more on the ball than we thought”
Teach a fish to play football and ... well, now you really could be on to something. Dean Pomerleau and
his son have trained a pet goldfish to "carry" a football, "shoot" a soccer ball into a net, even "dance"
the limbo. If you don't believe it, you can check out photos and videos at their Web site www.fish-school.
com.
Characters
1) Guppy 4 inch Goldfish
2) Dolphy Baby Female Dolphin
3) Dolpheen Mother Dolphin
4) Dolpher Father Dolphin
5) Doller Doctor Dolphin
6) Flicker Baby Great White Shark
7) BrightWhite Mother Great White Shark
8) MightyWhitey Father Great White Shark
9) SharkKool Black Tiger Shark
10) Dr. Mary Wong Battele Scientist
11) Dr. Dewey Duemore Battele Head
12) President President
13) Skinstein Vice President
14) Rumdum Secretary of Defense
15) Condum National Security Adviser
16) Barbie Presidents Wife
17) Monica Presidential Staff Secretary
18) Suzee Chong Presidents Secretary of Everything
19) General Knieval Navy Admiral 7th Fleet
20) Ying Chinese President
21) Yang Korean President
22) Captain Tubby Tugboat Captain
23) Sucker Scarab Captain
24) DeeDee Suckers Ex wife
25) Trebor President of Halbutt Corporation
Chapters:
1 Bass
2 Captain Tubby
3 Dolphy
4 FishHeads
5 Tap, Tap, Tap
6 Guppy
7 President
8 Sable Island
9 Executive Conversation
10 Kidnapped
11 Trebor Dances
12 First Blood Fishez
13 Tubby’s Headache
14 White House
15 Press Conference
16 Attacked
17 Butchered
18 The Meeting
19 Guppy Returns
20 Fishez Unite
21 It’s Showtime
22 Surrender
Excerpt from Chapters 1, 18, 19 & 20! Buy the Novel if you want to know the rest...it is Worth It...in
the Name of Saving Mankind!
Chapter One
Bass
“Oh no,” shouted Dr. Mary Wong, “another goldfish croaked on me!”
“Don’t worry about it,” sighed a weary Dr. Dewey Duemore, “there’s plenty of fish in the sea,” as he lit up
a black clove cigarette, took a big inhale, then slowly exhaled the black toxic fumes in and around the
fish tank.
“But,” she said, “I’ve been working with these 2 graduate guppies that I got from Dean’s fish college, for
the last 9 months straight.” She hesitated and sighed as she looked at the dead male goldfish.
“Poor little goldfish,” she whispered, “I finally got them both to understand Morse code by tapping it out
on the glass aquarium wall.”
Dr. Duemore put his arm around Dr. Mary Wong, to falsely comfort her on the goldfish’s untimely death
and gently touched her soft, pearl white left shoulder.
“Stop your hand right there,” whispered Dr. Wong. “You’re out of line!”
“Just trying to help,” laughed Dr. Duemore, “to get your mind off that stupid goldfish’s death!”
“Help take your mind off of whom?” questioned Dr. Wong, “you or me or the goldfish?” as Dr. Wong
shook off Dr. Dumore’s hand… which was now gently rubbing and squeezing her arm.
Dr. Duemore started to pout because his male macho mind was wandering and dreaming about Dr.
Wong. He’s been waiting to make love to Dr. Wong, a strikingly beautiful Korean Lady Doctor, for the last
10 months ever since he took over Battelle's Aquatic Strategic Sea-life department or “BASS” for short.
The previous Director, a Mr. Major Tac, ended up going totally insane thereby opening up this $400,000
per year position at the Top Secret government program at Battele’s Research Institute in Columbus,
Ohio.
“Look, Dr. Wong,” said Dr. Duemore, “don’t forget your mission as dictated directly by the President of
the United States.” He took a deep breath and shouted out, “the President himself wants us to utilize
Aquatic Life to spy and gather intelligence on all sea bound shipping traffic.”
“Yah, yah, yah,” said a grinning Dr. Wong, “the DEA wants drug smelling fish, the ATF wants gun smelling
fish, the IRS wants money smelling fish, and the Navy wants fish with nuclear torpedoes strapped to their
tail fins and painted red, white and blue!”
“And, don’t forget the President’s Grand Kids!” added Dr. Duemore, “demanding the fish to perform
aquatic back flip jumps in their private Texas saltwater swimming pool, just like they were trying to do at
Dean’s Goldfish College on the Internet!”
“The heck with the Presidents grand Texas rodent kids!” shouted Dr. Wong.
“Now, now,” answered Dr. Duemore, “we must pacify all of our superior’s requests.”
“You do all the Prez’s requests, Dr. Dewey Duemore, the next time the Prez visits this giant fish tank,”
shouted Dr. Wong.
“It’s not a fish tank!” snapped Dr. Duemore, “it’s a Think Tank!”
“Fish tank, fish tank, friggin fish tank!” snapped back Dr. Wong, “you’re not the one cleaning all of the
fish poop dumped on you by the Government cheese balls,” and then sneeringly said, “or are you?”
“Huck no!” replied Dr. Duemore, but knew otherwise.
Meanwhile, the remaining little 4 inch female goldfish seemed to be mourning her lost male mate by
swimming around in circles. Her eggs still unfertilized lying at the bottom of the tank. She was just
about to get them fertilized by her long time and faithful soul mate named Gupper ….the music was right,
the lights were dim…everything was just perfect for the creation of a new family between the two
guppies. But fate would have it otherwise.
Dr. Wong tapped the Morse code on the wall of the glass fish tank. “Tap, tap, tap…”
“S..O..R..R..Y.”
Surprisingly, the goldfish responded to her by slamming her tail fin against the sensors inside the tank.
Dr. Wong was startled and jumped back. She tripped across her own two feet as she tried to reach for
her notebook. Her hand was shaking as she wrote down the goldfish’s tail taps.
“Dot, dot, dash, dash, dot, dash, dash, dot,” continued for the next forty minutes.
Suddenly the goldfish stopped and went to the opposite corner of the tank.
Dr. Wong breathed a sigh of frustration. She’s been scratching down Morse code for almost an hour and
didn’t even have time to read what she wrote down…..as if there was anything to figure out. Dr.
Duemore was watching her during the entire time.
Dr. Wong’s tight light pink plaid skirt was high in the air, exposing her thigh. Duemore’s mind was
furiously playing within himself about her and not the research.
Suddenly Dr. Wong turned around and startled Dr. Duemore.
Dr. Duemore shook his head full of fantasies and tried to move the awkward situation by saying, “what
did the little goldfish say?”
“She said,” replied Dr. Wong, “she said…….”
“What?” exclaimed Dr. Duemore, “what did she say?”
“That you are a highly overpaid government official being paid for the brains that you don’t possess!”
laughed Dr. Wong, “ha, ha, ha.”
“Go shake a date yourself,” snapped Dr. Duemore, “Dr. Wong!”
“I don’t have to,” snapped back Dr. Wong, “I always have good dates.”
But alas, Dr. Wong was lying. In fact she hasn’t had a date in over a year. Ever since her encounter with
that Indian named Bucky from Mansfield, Ohio. Now locked up in State of Ohio mental institution
because of something to do with dead animals coming back for their Skinz and skinning the people
wearing their Skinz!
“O well,” Dr. Wong’s thinking shifted back to the goldfish saying under her breath, “I have to figure out
why all the tapping from that cute little goldfish,” as she started to feed the information into her Morse
code translation software on her laptop.
“Friggit,” sighed a weary Dr. Wong, as she hit the enter key.
Out of its screen jumped, “Et Cum Spiritu Tuo, Et Cum Spiritu Tuo, Et Cum Spiritu Tuo.”
“Forty five minutes of deciphering taps and all I get is this garbage,” shouted Dr. Wong, “pure garbage in
and now pure garbage out!”
”Holy mackerel,” whispered a weary Dr. Wong, “I have to get something out of this goldfish tapping
sounds.” She took a deep breath and sighed out, “I’ve got to get some kind of progress for this love sick
Director besides him wanting to simply overpower me,” as she hit the print key and stuffed the computer
printout into her tight fitting satin white coat pocket.
“Maybe something will make sense from this code smoke of some type of hieroglyphics,” she mumbled
as she took a long puff of her menthol cigarette.
She blew out the smoke with the words, “I just wish I could get something beneficial out of the funky fish
tanks besides fish fart poop from the funky smelling fish flakes!”
Dr. Wong exited the lab. She passed through the Security doors, into her pink Corvette and floored it
past the Security Guards at the gatehouse. She pelted them with rocks from the gravel exit road and
broke the gatehouse glass windows.
“Loser boozer!” shouted one of the two guards.
“Yeah, yeah,” added the second guard, “everyday, the same old stuff everyday, she’s spinning her tires
and throwing gravel on us.”
“Shut up,” shouted back the first guard, “you are a Marine so just take it and shut the buck up!”
“But I would like to get to know her,” he added, “know her well!”
“Yah,” sighed the first guard as he watched the Corvettes tail lights disappear into the setting sun over
Columbus Ohio, “me too.”
Dr. Wong turned on the radio, accidentally hitting on a religious station.
“Et Cum Spiritu Tuo,” chanted the radio. Dr. Wong started to chant along with it.
“Et Cum Spiritu Tuo,”…suddenly, her eyes grew wide. She then slammed the car to a screeching halt!
She pulled out the computer print out and read it in a very loud, but serious voice,
“Et Cum Spiritu Tuo, Et Cum Spiritu Tuo …. H2O?”
“H2O?” thought Dr. Wong.
Chapter 18
The Meeting
Movie Trailer Avaiable at;
www.MySpace.com/FishezTheMovie
Guppy was sunning herself under the nice warm rays of the afternoon sun. Catching a little nap, she
knew that she had to do her best to try and convince the world leaders to stop this all out unwarranted
brutal attack upon the Fishez of the ocean.
Little did she realize that she was heading into a trap. A trap designed to kill her and all of her new
found friends!
“Guppy,” said MightyWhitey, “I got some of my buddies to escort you to your meeting.”
“Thank you,” said Guppy, “you are most kind,” and she fell off into a much needed, deep sleep.
As Guppy slept, the Fishez of the oceans had heard about her and rallied in masses to the North side of
Sable Island from around the world.
Not just a few Fishez, but millions gathered within their new leaders waters. They patiently waited,
wished and hoped that Guppy could convince the world leaders of a peaceful solution.
A peaceful solution could stop the abuse and death of tens of millions of sea life creatures. A solution
allowing that they all could live in harmony on this planet.
“It is time,” whispered MightyWhitey, “it is time for your meeting,” and he woke up Guppy.
Guppy awoke, feeling rested but disturbed because she sensed a trap. She knew that she had to at
least take the risk of trying her best to change the Humans destructive thinking, even if she had to
sacrifice her own life! Much like another messenger from God did over 2000 years ago!
“I’m going too!” shouted Flicker.
“No!” said Guppy, “You need to be here, ah, protecting the Fishez.”
“And protecting me,” added Dolphy, who was falling deeper and deeper in love with that little mangled
tail shark.
“Then, onward we go!” shouted MightyWhitey as he signaled to the 200 Great White Shark Fishez
bodyguards.
MightyWhitey led the group towards the Glouster Bay Harbor. Guppy was hanging onto his tail with her
little teeth and front fins. The Shark Guards surrounded them.
As they entered the harbor, past the rocky entrance, the sun was just beginning to set on the horizon.
Sparkling, diamond studded waves made it the perfect atmosphere to conduct a peaceful meeting.
Upon reaching FishHeads, Guppy saw the President, his staff, the world leaders. Trebor was dressed in
a bright pink, pin stripe armor suit, holding a MP3 player in his hand for Guppy.
Guppy stood up upon MightWhitey’s back, took the MP3 player from Trebor and said, “Thank you, you are
a very kind person.”
“Shut up,” shouted the President, “you here to talk, or give up?”
Guppy turned to the numerous leaders, sitting on the decks of FishHeads and said, “I come in Peace and
want to leave in Peace.”
The leaders were amazed that Guppy could talk not only in English, but also in French, Spanish, Italian,
Chinese and numerous other languages.
“I am,” said Guppy, “simply a Messenger, delivering a Problem-less Peaceful Message, that we should
all, live in world peace with each other before problems arise that are out of all of our control.”
“What problem can we possibly learn from you,” asked the French leader.
"The first problem for the Human Race is not to learn, but to Unlearn," replied Guppy.
“You want to fight?” asked the German leader.
"I don't know how to fight,” replied Guppy, “All I know is how to stay alive."
“What do you know about what’s right for the world?” snapped the Turkish leader.
“Guppy said, "To put the world in order, we must first put the nation in order, to put the nation in order,
we must first put the family in order, to put the family in order we must first cultivate our personal life
and to cultivate our personal life, we must set our hearts right"
“Sounds like Confucius,” said Yang, the Japanese Leader
“It is, as you know,” said Guppy as she continued quoting Confucius, "The heart of the wise, like a mirror,
should reflect all objects without being sullied by any."
“You are free to speak,” said Ying, the Chinese Leader.
Guppy continued, “We should never let our fears hold us back, from pursuing hopes.”
“What idiot said that?” shouted the President.
“John F. Kennedy PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES 1917-1963,” replied Guppy.
“Just give up all your power and intelligence, and …” said the President, “and we will let you live in
peace.”
"You easily give up your Power," Guppy replied, "By thinking that you don't have any.”
“The truth is what I am telling you,” quipped the President
"Truth has rough flavors, when you chew it,” said Guppy, "You have only one soul, one Life that is
shortly lived alone caring about so many things which you should care nothing about on this earth,”
Guppy sighed and continued, “Because they are simply short interferences in pursuing the only One
Eternal Glory in Your Heaven.”
“What are you seeking?” quizzed the Spanish Leader.
Guppy replied, "We seek to make all earth life forms free to speak, express, worship and most of all free
from fear.”
“You say you lost your freedom to fear?” quizzed the Mexican Leader.
"When love, justice and force are lost by fear, then it's time to start over agai,” replied Guppy.
“We have done so much for the environment,” stated the Director of Greenpeace.
"One should never notice what has been done," replied Guppy, "But only see what remains to be done.”
“It takes courage,” snapped the President, “to be a President like me, a famous Navy Aviator Pilot, not a
stupid peace lover dover fish like you!”
"Courage is the price life extracts for granting peace," quoted Guppy,
“Who said that?” screamed the President, “that stupid cupid saying?”
“Amelia Earhart, a famous American true aviator,” said Guppy, "He who loses courage, has nothing worth
keeping."
“Courage is fearless!” snapped the President.
“Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear, not absence of fear," said Guppy quoting Mark Twain
AMERICAN WRITER 1835-1910.
The German leader, an ex-Nazi, shouted, “Are you Jew fish?”
Guppy answered, "He who has courage and faith, will never perish in misery,” quoting Anne Frank
GERMAN JEWISH SCHOOLGIRL DIARY 1929-1945.
“Why you living to die, to save the Fishez?” asked the Italian Leader.
"If I can save one living thing, then I shall not have lived in vain," replied Guppy.
“I want everything,” shouted the Iranian President.
"Teach your heart to want nothing it can't have," replied Guppy.
Ying added, "He who wishes to secure the good of others has already secured his own."
“Right on, Confucius,” replied Guppy, “Life begins and ends in a mystery, only you can build the bridge
between them and now is your Tomorrow.”
There was an obvious silence as the little goldfish’s statements mesmerized the world.
"Action will not bring happiness but there is no happiness without action," as Guppy cleared her throat,
she stated in a low stern voice, "The only thing in life that matters is your courage to get through it.”
“It’s all the United States fault,” screamed out the New Iraq President.
"Never Complain," added Guppy, "Never Explain.”
“Continue,” said Ying, “O, wise Guppy on what we should keep away from and what we should build.”
"Keep away from Wisdom that does not cry, keep away from Philosophy that does not laugh and keep
away from greatness that does not bow down from God," Guppy continued, "War destroys in order to
build deaths, not life.”
“Smart aleck fish,” snapped Skinstein.
“Let her speak,” said the Russian leader, “speak all that is on your mind, O wise Guppy on what we
should challenge.”
"Challenge everything in front of you and nothing behind you,” Guppy sighed out, "Because you and I
exist not in the minds of others, but in the minds of ourselves because hope rests on the wings of
lesser things than Kings.”
“Cement your fish lips shut!” snapped the President.
"Total love for life is the cement of the world," snapped back Guppy, “Non-Violence is the law of all
species; violence is the law of the extinct because wars for peace have no victories.”
“This fish witch bitch is getting on my nerves,” whispered the President to Skinstein.
Guppy continued, knowing that she only had a few moments to speak, "The highest level of work is not
what you get out of it, but what you become by it and to prove the possible, you must do the impossible.”
“You are evil,” shouted Skinstein, who was obviously upset by Guppy’s statements. He threw his veiled
Jewish Cap at Guppy just missing her by an inch.
"Lift the veil of evil and you will still find evil," shouted back Guppy, "Forget what you get, care what you
give.”
Rumdum whispered to the President, “We must kill this little ditch witch fish, right now because she’s
going to mess up our Master Democratic World Plan, the United States of Earth (USE).”
“Yes,” snapped back the President, “she’s too smart for us, way too, too smart.”
With that Rumdum whispered into the cell phone, connected to the Generals in Charge of the ambush
and said, “Now, attack now!”
"Accept Injustice, only from your grave," said Guppy, knowing what Rumdum said into his cell phone and
what was going to now happen. She then shouted out with all of her little might "Give me not sheltered
safety in chains, but liberty without them!"
Trebor also overheard Rumdum and yelled out, “Stop fighting, Guppy!”
“Stay out of this fight,” snapped Rumdum, “you flaming fart!”
"If you can't get out of a fight, get into it," screamed out Trebor, as he jumped into the shark filled ocean.
Trebors head emerged out of the water along with his white fake fur wrapped scarf. He gave the
President of the United States his fist and shrilled at the top of his lungs. "Give me liberty or give me
death," quoting Patrick Henry.
“No one gives the President the fist and gets away with it,” shouted Rumdum, as several Secret
Servicemen open up with their machine guns, “Ratta, tat, tat, tata, tatta, tat.”
Just then, 3 Great Whites jumped in front of Trebor, took all 80 rounds of 9mm machine gun bullets. They
died instantly.
“Kill that Guppy!” shouted the President, “he’s an obvious traitor to our country and an enemy of liberty.”
“Ratta, tat tat, tata, tatta tat,” went 80 rounds of bullets heading straight for Guppy.
“I will protect you,” shouted MightyWhitey, taking every bullet meant for Guppy.
“No, no,” Guppy shouted, “he’s a father, with a son.”
MightyWhitey was hit hard! His fish eyes and body were bleeding profusely from the penetration of the
numerous bullets. He sighed, “Go Guppy, swim as fast as you can, away from these murderers.” Blood
started coming out of his mouth as he gurgled out, “Here, take my Shark tooth, aaand … and give it to my
son, Flicker, please tell him that love him and his mother so very, very much,” and with that,
MightyWhitey rolled onto his back and died. His fish eyes remained wide open, reflecting the now
laughing human images on the deck of FishHeads.
“No, no, no,” cried Guppy, “no, no, no!”
Ying kicked the President in the shins, screaming, “No one dishonors Confucius.” The Secret
Servicemen then opened up their machine guns on him, “Ratta, tat tat, tata, tatta tat,” wounding him,
along with Yang who was assisting his oriental buddy in kicking the Presidents shins.
“Now,” shouted Rumdum into the Cell phone, “right now, my mighty United States Troops!”
Immediately, the PT Navy boats drew their fishnets across the harbor, trapping the 200 sharks plus
Guppy within it.
“Booom, boooom, bboooooom,” went the underwater mines with a deafening shock killing explosion
force. Immediately killing over half of the sharks, “Booom, boooom, bboooooom”
As the remaining sharks made it to the surface, Air Force Jets came in with their machine guns blazing,
“Ratta, tat tat, tata, tatta tat … Ratta, tat tat, tata, tatta tat … Ratta, tat, tat, tata, tatta, tat…”
“Looks like shark soup for our daily special tonight,” quipped the Owner of the FishHeads restaurant.
The remaining Sharks protected both Trebor and Guppy, but they were losing their comrades fast, too
fast. As four died, 4 four more came to Guppy’s protection.
Trebor’s pink armor suit became discolored and engulfed with seaweed in the turmoil waters. His new
red and blue boots floated to the surfaced, still mismatched. He had just got the outfit last night as a
present from DeeDee, not knowing that DeeDee wore the same outfit for the President when he first
arrived in Glouster.
Both Guppy and Trebor were now riding upon the 2 fastest Great White Sharks; the others were taking
massive amounts of bullets trying to their best to protect them.
Just then, a barracuda fish came up and told Guppy that they had cut a hole within the fishnets, to give
them an escape route. MightyWhitey had set it up with the Barracudas prior to the meeting. He also
suspected a trap by the humans, but would not live long enough to tell about it, or ever see his only son
again.
“Hold on, Trebor!” yelled Guppy, “Hold your breath.” They held on to the 2 Great White Sharks
submerging down 20 feet and through the hole in the net.
They both surfaced about 500 yards from the nets and were momentarily safe.
As Guppy was looking back into the Glouster Harbor, she was appalled at the sight of hundreds of dead
Great White Sharks. They were floating and bleeding belly up. The poor Fishez were being used as a
carnival game with the Harbors Boaters cutting and re-cutting their bodies up with their sharp propellers.
The guard Sharks, all 200 of them, sacrificed their lives in protecting Guppy!
Guppy looked at MightyWhiteys single tooth and tears started rolling down her face.
Guppy turned to Trebor and said, "Suffering teaches you what you cannot be taught." She then turned
back to the Glouster Harbor’s up and coming new Fishez graveyard.
“Jesus,” screamed out Trebor, “what, in Gods name … would Jesus do?”
“Jesus … said it best,” sighed Guppy, "Do unto others, as you would have them do unto you!”
Chapter 19
Guppy Returns
“It’s them!” yelled Flicker “It’s Guppy on the horizon!”
“I smell blood,” whispered BrightWhite, “lots of blood!”
“Guppy, Guppy!” shouted Flicker “How did it go?” He looked around Guppy and asked, “Where’s the
rest of the sharks?”
“Where’s my husband?” cried out BrightWhite, “Where’s Mighty Whitey?”
Guppy looked and starred at BrightWhite, then she looked at the rest of the Fishez, all of whom were
eagerly awaiting good news, but they were not to have any…today!
“I’m sorry,” cried out Guppy, “BrightWhite … your husband and MightyWhitey gave up their lives to save
me from the humans,” Guppy swam over next to BrightWhite and sobbed, “here is his tooth, he wanted
you to have it before he died.”
“Nooo, no, no,” cried BrightWhite, “not my MightyWhitey,” she sobbed and sobbed.
“Mmmyyy, my daddy,” sobbed Flicker “is not coming home to me?”
“I am afraid to say, yes,” said Guppy, “your father was a very brave shark, the bravest that I have ever
known.”
“No!” sobbed Flicker “Not, not my daddy!” Dolphy swam next to him, trying her best to comfort him in his
need of sorrow along with hers.
“Where are the rest of the guard sharks?” asked Doc Doller.
“Gone,” whispered Guppy, “it was a trap by the humans, and, and they all died except for these last two
brave ones,” Guppy looked at the injured ones and said, “Doc, please tend to their wounds as best that
you can, please.”
Trebor wept at the sight of the crying Fishez. Never has he seen such emotion, nor would he ever
permit this to happen again to any living species. He was a changed man. “No more Misses nice
person,” he thought, “now, a scorned, bad bitch!”
“I failed!” sighed a tearful Guppy, “I failed so very miserably, failed, failed.”
“Failure is not an option,” Trebor shouted out to Guppy “failure is not an option,” as he was joined in by
hundreds, then thousands, then millions of Fishez chanting, “Failure is not an option, failure is not an
option, failure is not an option!”
Guppy’s eyes grew wide because her students had now become the teachers. She was so very proud of
that fact. Guppy whispered to herself, "Pray with your heart, not words and you will hear the right beats.”
She then turned to the tens of millions of Fishez that starred at her every move. Guppy said in a low
deep tone of voice, "Peace does not compromise with evil, live for your Seeds, not among Weeds.”
With that said, Guppy turned to Flicker and then she said with a tear in her eye, “Your father is counting
on you to take his place.” BrightWhite then wrapped MightyWhiteys tooth in a string of seaweed and
wrapped it around Flicker’s neck.
“Wear this to know your roots and to protect from all harm,” said BrightWhite to Flicker, gently giving him
a kiss.
Flicker turned to BrightWhite and cried out, "When you kiss me mommy, I stay kissed.”
Guppy turned to the Fishez and shouted, "The ultimate strength of a nation, depends entirely upon the
support of it's people, sacrifices of your life, requires an uncommon cause, if we think, then we are able
to accomplish everything that is right, accomplish everything that is good and accomplish everything
that is just!”
“Go now and tell every fish in the ocean to assemble themselves,” shouted Guppy to the Fishez “Here is
where we make our stand!”
Guppy turned her head around and looked at the rivers of blood pouring out of the Glouster Harbor
towards them. Guppy had only two words left inside of her for the Human Race. Two words and only two
words was all that she could muster up.
Guppy slowly turned her head back toward the Fishez that were starring at her. And then turned her
head back towards the bloody Glouster harbor, saying in a low deep stern voice…..
…“Let’s Play!”
Chapter 20
Fishez Unite
“Mr. President, Mr. President,” yelled out Rumdum, “Mr. President.”
“What?” snapped the President, “Who’s pissed at us now?”
“Our satellites indicate,” stuttered Rumdum, “that massive objects are moving on the oceans floor.”
“So what,” quipped the President, “is it an Earthquake?”
“No,” answered Rumdum, “it’s more like living creatures, massive amounts of living creatures.”
“What?” shouted the President, “Fishez?”
“Yep, Fishez!” whispered Rumdum, “Lots and lots of Fishez!”
“How many?” asked the President, “How riggin friggin many?”
“Well,” stuttered Rumdum “over a billion of them!”
“What?” snapped the President, “What are they doing, who the heck are they after?”
“Well, taking an educated guess, I’d say,” said Rumdum, “that they are after us Humans!”
“No way!” sighed the President “If it isn’t Humans declaring war on us, it’s the Fishez”, “Where’s
Skinstein?”
“Ah, he just submitted his resignation,” answered Rumdum, “and boarded the last jet to Mexico City, said
something about practicing Mexican Quail Hunting at the JewCrew Vodka Bar atop the Mayan ruins just
south of Cancun.”
“Jiggin riggin, screwey coward,” snapped the President, “get me Dr. Wong on the phone, at Battelle.”
“Ah,” responded Rumdum “she’s still in HDT School.”
“Get her on the phone,” ordered the President.
“Ring, ring, ring,” the HDT secretary answered it, “Hello?” Dogs were barking in the background, “Arff,
arff, arffff, arrrfff, arf.”
“This is the President? I want Dr. Wong on this phone within 5 minutes!”
“Arff, arff, arffff, arrrfff, arf, this is Dr. Dog Wong, Arff, arff, arffff, arrrfff, arf.”
“I need your help,” shouted the President, “we are under attack by all of the worlds Fishez!”
“Well,” Dr. Wong said, “I guess that you are in the words of my new found friends here, Doggy dudu,
woof woof to you!” and she slammed down the phone, abruptly cutting off the conversation.
“Shit,” whispered the President to himself, “I dog screwed myself again!”
“Get all of our armed forces together,” ordered the President, “and all of the world’s Armed Naval forces
including the kayakers up on the Yukon River, we must muster all of our might and kick those Fishez
Asses, once and for all!”
“We attack Sable Island again at dawn,” snapped the President, “at dawn, we will let all the other forces
get ready to attack on my word and I order all governmental employees to eat only fish foods, and tell the
TV stations to stop running Charlie the Tuna ads cause he’s a stinking terrorist in disguise!”
Rumdum dialed his cell phone to the General of the Navy Yards stationed at Annapolis, Maryland, “Ring,
Ring.”
“General Kneviel, here,” answered the Navy General.
“Kneviel, this is Rumdum,” shouted Rumdum, “I want every available Navy boat and submarine in this
sector, deployed to Sable Island at dawn and every friggin fish is to be blown out of the water!” Rumdum
then commanded General Kneviel “Inform all other war ships to find and team up with the Halibutt’s toxic
waste ships to annihilate the evil demons from the underworld!”
“You mean,” replied General Kneviel, “Fishez?”
“Any friggit thing that has a fin on it!” screamed Rumdum, “The President and I will observe your actions
from Marine One Helicopter.”
“Yeeess,” stuttered General Kneviel, “you got it,” and Rumdum hung up the phone, “Click.”
General Kneviel shouted to his First Officers, “Get every Navy man, every Boat that can shoot a rubber
band, every Nuclear Sub in this sector to be on the way to Sable Island,” and continued in a low
monotone voice, “We attack the Fishez at dawn!”
“Fishez?” chorused the Officers.
“Yes … Anything with a fin or swims is to be destroyed,” shouted General Kneviel, “I want sushi for
everyone in Annapolis, by tomorrow night!”
“Ok!” responded the Officers, “It’s going to be like shooting fish in a barrel, a big barrel … ha, ha, hee,
ho…” Then they laughingly left General Kneviel’s office.
Meanwhile, back at Sable Island, Guppy had just woken up from a much-needed nap. To her surprise,
and as far as she could see, there were Fishez, tens of billions and billions of Fishez, scattered out all
over the ocean.
They were chanting, “Guppy, Guppy, Guppy.”
Each of the species of Fishez had a General in charge of that species and the Generals were all lined up
in front of Guppy. Saluting her with their fins!
Flicker, now led the Sharks of the ocean.
“General Shark Flicker,” he said as he saluted Guppy, “all of our Generals are reporting for duty, Sir.”
Then, each of the Fishez’s Generals, lined up and introduced themselves in alphabetical order of their
Species:
“General Angel Fish, reporting for duty, sir, we will nurse the injured fish since we have no fighting
ability but there are over a million Angels standing by and plenty more Angels, up in heaven to take care
of any lost brethren.”
Guppy replied, “Good, you are both beautiful and caring, take your positions around all of the Fishez
hospitals.”
“General Angler Fish, reporting for duty, sir, we will scare the heck out of anyone, who looks at us.”
Guppy replied, “Good, they humans thing that you are both ugly and scary, take your positions around all
of the beaches of the world.”
“General Barracuda reporting for duty, sir, we will bite, chomp and tear up anything shiny or not, we
number about 120 million worldwide!”
Guppy replied, “Good, you have great teeth, take your positions around all of the boaters, sunbathers
and scuba divers of the world and I just want you to scare them, not kill them unless you hear from me!”
“General Dolphin Dolpheen reporting for duty, sir, we will take care of all of the orphaned Fishez
families, we number about 48 million worldwide!”
“Dolpheen,” Guppy replied, “I admire you, you are very brave and generous courage, Dolpher would
have been proud of you Dolphy, you stay close to your mother.”
“General Moray Eel reporting for duty, sir, we will neutralize all boat communications with our electricity,
we number about 348 million worldwide that can generate over a trillion watts of high voltage!”
Guppy replied, “Good, you have the electricity to shock em back into reality, take your positions around
all of the boats, subs and ships of the world.”
“General Jelly Fish reporting for duty, sir, we will screw up all of the propellers with seaweed and sting
the crap out of any human in the waters, we number about 808 million worldwide including 41 million
Special Forces - Man of Wars!”
Guppy replied, “Good, you have the tentacles to wrap them up, take your positions around all of the
boats and ships of the world along sides with the electric Moray Eels.”
“General Manatee reporting for duty sir, we are just gentle, kind and caring, we number about forty
thousand worldwide, we will assist the Dolphins in nursing the sick and wounded Fishez.” The gentle
Manatee then sighed out, “We are sorry that we are so gentle.”
Guppy whispered, "Compare your accomplishments with your capabilities, not others.” I admire your
very softness and caring but I want every human being solder that was simply following orders to be
saved … General Dolpheen will direct your efforts!”
“Why should we save soldiers?” shouted out Flicker.
“Because,” stated Guppy, “Two wrongs don’t make a right!”
“General Octopus reporting for duty, sir, we will reach and grab the human warriors off of the boats, and
give them to the Barracudas to play with, we number about 198 million worldwide including 11 million
Giant Pacific Ones with 90 foot arms!”
Guppy replied, “Good, you have the long strong tentacles to wrap them up with intelligent brains to
figure out the human maneuvers, take your positions around all of the boats and ships of the world,
along sides with the electric Moray Eels.”
“General Manta Ray, reporting for duty, sir, all of us Rays will salvage the unexploded Bombs, there are
millions of them on the ocean floors from the last 80 years, and ram them into the warships, we number
about 120 million worldwide including 21 million, 22 foot Manta Rays!”
Guppy replied, “Good, you drive and deliver all of the bombs into the ships, take your positions around
all of the boats and ships of the world!”
“General Gay Trebor reporting for duty, sir, I can, well, I can sew, I can look pretty, I can, can”
“Ok, ok,” laughed Guppy, “you can ... hmmm … be the next President of the United States!”
“Well,” smiled Trebor, “I can certainly do a better job than him, first thing is to paint the White House in a
soft shade of pink and, and ...”
“Ok, ok, ok,” said Guppy, “you concentrate on re-decorating the Human Race!”
“General White Shark Flicker reporting for duty, sir, the sharks will leap and attack and grab the human
warriors off of the boats, and eat them like Sushi, we number about 38 million worldwide, with 14 million
of us, over 37 feet, we are streamlined torpedo body swimmers and ferocious predators with 3,000 teeth
at any one time, I do this for my father, MightyWhitey.”
Guppy replied, “Your father would have been very proud of you!”
“General Tiger Shark SharkKool reporting for duty, sir, we will kick their friggin butts, and turn them into
friggin slaves, no friggin humans, gonna screw with the Hood Fishez, we number about 88 million
worldwide with strong ties to the Alligators Bloods and Croc Crypts, I do this for BrightWhite, the only
woman that I have ever really loved.”
“I knew that you’d come back,” cried BrightWhite, “I just knew it but I am pregnant with MightyWhitey’s
child.”
“MightyWhitey took care of my child for me, during my prison stint, and now I will take care of his child for
him, may he rest in peace.”
“Thaaank you,” cried BrightWhite as she gave SharkKool a kiss.
“General Swordfish reporting for duty, sir, we will stab and grab the humans, no matter where they hide
out and make human shish ka bobs out of them for the Barracudas, we number about 53 million
worldwide!”
Guppy replied, “Good, leap high, fly like the wind and find your human marks!”
Just then, a huge, massive elongated body of almost 200 feet long and 10 tons parted the Fishez. Its
eyes were the size of basketballs with a most sinister look upon them. Massive 8 foot suction cups were
at the end of its numerous tentacles.
Guppy whispered “What in the world is this creature, something from another planet?”
“General Giant Squid reporting for duty, sir, we have been attacking ships, off and on since time began,
and now, we are really pissed at all of the toxic bullshit lying at the bottom of the oceans.”
“Darn you’re big,” said Guppy, “how many are you?”
“Classified Sir,” answered General Giant Squid, “but a lot more than Halibutt’s toxic waste barges out
there!”
“Over 8000 of you?” asked Guppy.
“Add a couple of zeros to that,” laughed General Giant Squid, “we’ve been laying low for the last 300
years breeding a Super Size Giant Squid and I am just a baby … ha, ah, ha, ha.”
“Think you could take out a 200 foot Naval Destroyer?” asked Guppy.
“No problem,” laughed General Giant Squid, “piece of cake … Ha, ah, ha, ha.”
“Think you could take out a 1200 foot Air Craft Carrier?” asked Guppy.
“No problem,” laughed General Giant Squid, “it’ll just take a couple of us … ha, ah, ha, ha.”
“Good,” Guppy replied, “go destroy any big boat that has a cannon on it that is trying to harm any Fishez!”
“No problem,” laughed General Giant Squid, “we’ve been waiting a long time for this! Ha, ah, ha, ha.”
“Hmmm?” Guppy thought, “Didn’t know, things like that even existed on this planet.”
General Leatherback Turtle reporting for duty, sir, we are sick and tired of being turned into Turtle Soup
and now, we are very upset about the tables being made out of our shells!”
“Hey,” yelled General SharkKool, “they can roll with the Alleys and Crocs and attack the humans on the
land!”
“Good idea,” replied Guppy, “take your positions up with the Crocs and Alleys.”
“Say,” asked SharkKool, “is dat 50 Cent on your Mp3, get rich or die trying?”
“Shure is,” replied Guppy as they both started to rap to the song.
Just then, another very loud rapper came upon them, with an 188 decibel level, deafening everyone’s
ears, “Boom, backa, BOOM, backa, BOOM!”
“General Blue Whale reporting for duty, Sir, we Blues, we weigh around 175 tons apiece, fast swimmers
and number about 14,000 around the world, plus another 3 million smaller whales.”
“Dang,” replied Guppy, “take your positions up with the Giant Squids.”
“No way,” replied General Blue Whale, “Whales and Giant Squids don’t see eye to eye.”
”Yes way,” ordered Guppy, “United we stand, divided we fall!”
“Big Beachy Blue Whale,” snorted General Giant Squid, “I can kick your fat blue butt anytime I want to!”
“Not today!” snorted back General Blue Whale.
“Stop it,” shouted Guppy, “direct your egos and energy to the human enemy, not each other!”
“Alll righttt, all right,” chorused the Giant Squid and Blue Whale Generals.
“No singing, whaleseee, whaleseee,” laughed General Giant Squid, “ha, hee, a, ha, ha ahaa, ha, ha.”
“Close your ears,” whispered back General Blue Whale, “If ya got any.”
“Ok Generals,” shouted Guppy, “at dawn … is D-Day!”
“Today belongs to the Humans … Tomorrow….”
…..“Belongs to the Fishez!!”
You want more?....
...Buy the Novel!!
Click on...
www.FishezNovel.com
Email; MDS@MDStevens.Net
My Trailer deserves Special Thanks to
(Please email them with your comments):
Without them, I am....less than nothing!
Marisa Sobeski
Bad Bitch Films
Neil Zaza
Greatest Guitarist in the World!
To View Trailer of Chapter 18, go to;
www.MySpace.com/FishezTheMovie
www.YouTube.com/BadBitchFilms
www.OnTheLot.com/BadBtchFilms
